Attending a wedding in this economy can be a big undertaking! In this day and age, it’s not just a wedding, there’s an engagement party, bridal/wedding shower, bachelorette/bachelor party, and then the wedding!

You may be on the fence if you should go to all these events or none of them, and what to do if you don’t go.

There are plenty of reasons you may not be able to attend the events leading up to the wedding, like financial stress, proximity, family obligations, another wedding, previous engagements/trips, etc. and let’s be real life is busy and there are only 52 weekends in a year. If you were not able to prioritize any of the events leading up to the wedding here is what I recommend doing instead to still show support for that lovely couple in your life:

1. Send a personalized note expressing how sad you are to miss it
2. Send flowers or something yummy if flowers aren’t there thing
3. Ask to grab coffee or dinner to chat about how the event went
4. Give them a call! (free and personal)
5. Offer to help with any wedding prep, a brides to-do list is never ending
6. Send a gift off their registry with a thoughtful note
7. Take them for some pampering

Now let’s talk about missing the wedding. While it’s never the goal to miss a once in a lifetime event of a close friend or families life, here’s what I recommend doing instead to still send the lovely couple some love and support:

1. Attend the ceremony only! This could help remove some financial stress and saves the bride and groom a head count. The most important part of the day is their union after all
2. Give them a call before declining if they expected you to be there
3. Send a card
4. Send a gift
5. Give them a call (again free and personal!)

Im no bride whisperer, so I can’t promise these alternative methods to attending their wedding won’t cause any hurt feelings because while you may have other reasons to not go, to them they might be thinking there is only one wedding in their lifetime, so be sure to handle it with extra care!